First I need to indicate that this blog post is response four (4) of four (4) and is in reference to the comments made to the previous post, “Feminist with Traditional Values/Beliefs http://brendamarin.blogspot.com/2010/06/feminist-with-traditional-valuesbeliefs.html – Answer to blog post question.” If you haven’t already you may want to read the comments to the mentioned post so that this new post makes sense to you.
To Anonymous 4: I believe I addressed why I believe we are the first generation to really live with the benefits of the modern women’s movement in my above statements. Unfortunately, to this day CEOs are still dominated by males and in the professional world we as women still have to figure out how to break the glass ceiling. Although I believe it has moved and the glass is much thinner it’s unfortunately still there. However, the message in today’s media tells most women that by sleeping our way to the top is the most freeing/satisfying, powerful and fastest way to get the “job” done (no pun intended). Maybe we as older and wiser women understand the complications to using our sexuality to get us further in life, but young impressionable women do not understand the distinction and if in their books, their favorite T.V. shows, and in the movies this is the ultimate portrait of women again how do we as women find a more powerful message about celebrating why we are unique as female leaders with unique female management styles. Yes, we do need to teach our young girls about independence and finding their own passions and success because the divorce rate is so high and well let’s face it if the modern message to women is use your looks and body to get what you want unfortunately our looks do eventually fade and not all of us can afford Dr. 90210 (okay sorry for the sarcasm). As I mentioned before 49% of our population is men in this world and no matter how much we say that men will not have any say in our lives and the improvement of this world they will and we need to find a much better way to discuss the balance between men and women and what each can bring to the corporate table, the world table, the volunteer table, the non-profit table, the social-activities table, the Church table, etc.
For my lesbian sisters, we as women need to also figure out better how we celebrate each other and love one another in all of our uniqueness and the gifts each of us as women bring to one another. This world may seem in a big picture to be male/female because that is an easy categorization, but I do believe that as women we beat each other up over minute details and no matter our belief system or our choices in lovers we have a message to bring to this next generation and we cannot let a over sexualized male dominated media world define who we are as women.
To Rachel: Thank you for asking the question and allowing for this conversation to continue and be blogged about. I am glad I was able to clear up what I meant by traditional beliefs. It has taken me a long time and quite a bit of my own soul searching to be able to validate and celebrate with women who are significant in all of their roles no matter if that is “traditional” wife/mother, career woman, lesbian, “non-traditional” wife/mother, etc. I wish too that I could have been in the U.K. to experience the entire event and am glad that you were able to meet Andrew. I think he is a pretty great guy! I agree with what you wrote with regards to understanding the relationship you are in and the different roles each of you play in order to make the relationship work. I love that you include your young daughter and with regards to Andrew and I we really do have a great partnership as well with very equal say and equal responsibility, we have just agreed that he can be in many parts of our relationship the deliverer of the message. I hope if Andrew is back in the U.K. that I will be able to go with him and we do get a chance to meet. I would also love to meet your whole family!
To Anonymous 5: I don’t even want to take the time to respond. Of course I know that there are many lesbian mothers and families. Andrew and I live in the LGBT neighborhood in Chicago. Again, I was attempting to reference the actual event I was speaking at and the audience which was receiving my message at the time. If you have daughters then I hope we can all as women figure out how to make sure they are beautiful, strong, women who love everything about themselves inside and out. Who understand that we are unique and it’s okay to celebrate in that uniqueness. That we as women can dream as big as we want and accomplish anything we want and it’s okay to celebrate also being a wife and mother. We are all significant in the roles we find ourselves and can change the world around us just by being women.